Brainerd Q. Bitchslap, 1/22/06-

Not long after the dawn of the Coco Crisp era in Boston, I welcomed the Brainerd Q. Bitchslap era in Framingham. While I'm not usually one to name my own alteregos, Brainerd Q. Bitchslap looks like my most promising Mr. Hyde since Andre Pike, who lived in me about 20 hours a week in 2000.

Mr. Bitchslap's first appearance in public was at Bennigan's, where he watched the first half of tonight's NFC Championship with Jill. We got IDed for a Miller Lite and a Sam Adams Winter Lager (Brainerd Q's drink of choice?) and Jenna, our vacantly cute waitress, was first shocked that Jill was born in 1974, then equally shocked that I was born in 1980, muttering something like "oh my totally backwards!". Our first lesson about BQB- he looks older than he is, and likes young-lookin' older ladies.

A few more notes about Brainerd- he likes to cook (he cooked or bought every morsel of food he and Jill consumed this weekend, something Bryan would certainly never do). He hates the Steelers more than ever, but is excited for the Seahawks and their first trip to the Super Bowl. He drives his 1996 Accord recklessly, having already traded it in for a new model. And he sure as hail doesn't watch Desperate Housewives (ok, he lies- he's not perfect; he also spends an inordinate amount of time discussing potential baby names, despite fatherhood being a distant venture).

Brainerd Q. Bitchslap, signing off.